14 септември, 2013

in need of hero

Okay, I am admiting this only here and I will not speak of it ever again. I mean, it is a bit obvious but I hate to have to actually say it or even ask for it.
I only ever run away just a little, to see if you would follow me. I only ever tell you to stay away, just so you can come and hold me and demand that you don't want to. Sometimes I wait for you to call, just to see if you actually would, if the thought of me would cross your mind. I say I want space, while in fact I want you as close as possible.
I remember back then that it meant the world when I called you and surprised you or the other way around. You would hang up and then call again, just to hear my voice. We would tell each other how the day went in all the little details, as if they are so important.
I miss us, okay. I miss our fake fight when you got home early and surprised me. I miss talking on the phone until the battery died and... I'm starting to feel stupid for writing this. Because I am not writing or even telling it to the right person and it kinda loses all its meaning.
I remember I had a point to start writing this and it was a good one. I guess you can't really expect a girl to write when she's in a silence bubble and the growing urge to buy herself tons of chocolate. Yep, because everything a girl wants is for someoneto want her back, love her back, need her back, miss her back. Just for the sake of ballance if nothing else. What you don't know can't hurt you, right? Then why do I feel so miserable, not knowing if my presence means all that much anymore. Because I should know better than to ask questions to which I don't really want to hear the answer to.

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