22 август, 2014

till i lose control

Of everything I've lost, I miss myself the most...
Wait, what?! How did I become the one being played?
He is going to be the death of me and what is left of my soul and sanity. And I can't seem to mind.

It goes with the song I wrote and what a friend said about sending my character to hell so she can come back leading the devil himself. From the ashes I will rise. I need to burn it all down so I can find what is left of me and start over. And if you are the key to that I gladly agree to be played. Damn you! Damn you and your music and your magic. Damn your lips and damn your touch.

No one tells me to shut the fuck up. And I'd never listen, but last night my words were gone or wouldn't come out right and that should be telling me a lot. You are evil and you don't play fair. I thought I was the evil one. Because I've learned from the best of them all. I can play games and lie till the lie becomes me. I don't want to. I don't need to. Because I need you to be scared. I need you to not thrust me and to see all the reasons why I am no good for you. I am not good for anyone right now. Because what doesn't kill you sure as hell fucks you up for good.


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