31 януари, 2015

falling all the same

'You're awesome' and the cute and shy smile you say it with.
Calling me just to say good night.

-И умната!
-Вече съм с нея.
I can't help myself. I'm making plans. And it sucks, because my planning skills are great and I have this big plan formed which only took two hours of research. Of course, I'm keeping all of this to myself and not saying a thing, because we're not making plans and promises. But it's all right there in my head now, so I might as well keep my options open. 
I just want to talk to you and watch movies. I want to go out or stay home or do anything really. I'm starting to like this new undefined us way too much and I'll be sorry as usual. And I won't be mad silly. As long as I know that I'm the only girl on your mind, you can go anywhere and do anything. 
I can make plans with you and without you. I already have ideas. The thing is I want to make plans with you. And I might be crazy but there are those little moments when I catch you looking at me when I'm not or saying stuff as a joke or in a low voice, so I won't notice. You said falling for me will be easy and the rest will be hard. I think the rest is pretty simple. It will take some more hours of planning and that'd it. The hard part is you figuring your own issues. And I wish I could help with that but we all have to take care of our demons and ghosts. 
I guess I should keep enjoying it and try not to think so much. But you are your old and loving self, the one I fell for, so it's not that easy. I know it takes time. I just wish I have the patience not to ruin it by saying something. 

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