01 юни, 2015


I am starting to doubt my own pessimistic thoughts about the future and I don't like it. The dreamer in me is not dead after all and is starting to draw pictures of a future we share. And that scares me to death. I kind of want to silence her but in the same time I'm glad she's still alive. It's like there is hope for me, but also there are pieces to be broken, I guess. Now I know what that quote (which I can't quite remember as words but I remember it's meaning) actually feels like. It sucks to want to make plans and to be afraid of them failing yet again. Yes, I love her for being right about it all. I always worry, and she always has faith for the both of us. She has faith in you too. Please don't fail us again.
Enough with the pessimism. I have two weeks of studying overload and writing papers, projects and presentations and then I will have my much needed break from this reality. I guess I should make a list of all the books, movies and TV shows I will watch. I could use the escape before the exams begin.
I feel inspired. My head is full of these ideas, as usual when I am busy doing other stuff, and I don't have the time to write it all down. And when I have the time, the ideas will be gone. Good thing is they come back sometimes. Some of them. But I should really start writing it all down. I can't wait for my Creative writing class next year, if I can even finish this one. Of course, with my luck it will suck, but I will still be happy to be tortured. Yes, that's the spirit. After all, my insanity is the source of my ideas recently, so there is a nice upside.
I've read so much academic literature, that I'm dying for some sci-fi or fantasy. Yep, I will start making lists of all the awesome things I will be doing when the semester is over and then when the exams are over. Well, after the second one the dreamer in me has already made plans with him, which is going to be another thing to get over once karma shows up, but that's another story. And you know, I love having question marks in my life - two of them, in fact. At least I think they are two. Time will tell, I guess.
Oh, and there's this new epic TV show. I can't wait for more episodes. It's called Stitchers. 

Няма коментари: